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depression can be fun

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Your Questions About Depression Answered


Question

Help me to eat a lot better on a budget

Dear Marisa,

How are you?  I need ideas for some tasty food, which is healthy. I need to get a good balance of all good things.
I looking to hearing from you

Kind regards

Paul

Answer

Hello Paul,
Thank you for your question.  I thought you might find my menu suggestion helpful which gives you my breakfast, lunch and dinner choices.  I hope you like some of them.
http://www.marisapeer.com/node/179
Best wishes,
Marisa

Marisa Peer
Hypnotherapist, psychotherapist, lecturer,broadcaster, author

Question

Hi Marisa

Good foods to help me

Answer

Hi Paul
Some really good foods to help you would be oily fish like salmon, sardines,
mackerel and pilchards because they are full of omega 3 oils. Omega 3 oils are
known as essential oils they are essential for our brains and without them we
can feel depressed and miserable you need to take some form of omega 3 every day
as they have a direct effect on our mental health and feeling of wellbeing so
aim to eat oily fish 3 times a week and on other days eat olives, avocados and
any nuts or seeds like brazil nuts, almonds, walnuts and hazelnuts, sesame
seeds, pumpkin seeds and sunflower seeds because they are also full of omega 3
oils. Brazil nuts also contain selenium which stops you absorbing mercury in
fish.
Oats have a very relaxing, calming effect on us and are a wonderful food to have
for breakfast.  Add a few nuts or even a swirl of peanut butter and a banana to
start the day perfectly.
The other foods that are perfect for people who feel a little low are foods that
are high in serotonin, serotonin is a feel good hormone the foods that are
packed full of serotonin are:
Eggs
Bananas
Coriander
Turkey and chicken
Dark chocolate
Dates and pears
Celery
Eggs are a wonder food and we should eat them every week they contain everything
to make life and are full of vitamins, zinc and calcium.
Bananas contain dopamine as well as serotonin both are natural anti depressants
maybe that’s why monkeys are so happy.
A little dark chocolate is good but avoid sugar as it feeds anxiety
Avoid artificial sweeteners as they can intensify depression instead have
natural sweeteners like stevia or Zsweet.
Don’t eat margarine full of trans fats instead have pure spread made of
sunflower or soya as the chemicals in refined processed foods can also disrupt
our brain chemistry.
If you include most of the foods in your weekly diet you will start to feel much
better.
Very best
Marisa xx

Marisa Peer
Hypnotherapist, psychotherapist, lecturer,broadcaster, author

 

 

Question

recovering from depression

hi, i am recovering from my clinical depression, l left counselling early in February, my doctors are reducing my antidepressaants for an eventual freedom from them, I still find it difficult however to do things like wake up in the morning, do my uni work, and sort my finances, i’ve missed lessons and my tutors are frustrated, some tips/advice would be trés awesome.

Answer

Hi Thanks for your question and first of all, congratulations on taking such a massive step and moving towards eventual freedom from your prescription drugs.  Please do remember to take some time each day to praise yourself for all that you have already achieved. 
One thing that often works well is to buy a little journal and write in it every day the things you have achieved today - like Monday:  got to lecture on time, Tuesday caught the bus to Uni - and so on - only record in here the things you have achieved and not the things that you haven’t.  This works in two ways - one to start to train your mind to recognise your achievements and also if you have a not so good day - it is good to look back at your journal and remind yourself of all that you have indeed achieved and how far you have come.
As for waking in the morning - with the clocks going back this weekend - it may be a little easier this week with the mornings being a bit lighter for a week or two.  I wonder if you could think of what would work for you to enable to you wake and get out of bed feeling better?  How do you wake yourself up now?  Maybe an electric alarm - think of other ways that may be more pleasurable for you?  Maybe you have a favourite band or a favourite “feel good” song - could you use an ipod as an alarm to wake you - or another way so that you are woken by your favourite music?  On a recent yoga retreat I ran, one of my jobs was to “gong” every morning to wake everyone for their morning yoga practice and many people commented how much nicer it was to be woken by that sound rather than an electronic alarm.  Maybe investigating sounds that could wake you so that you would feel more positive to start your day?
What kind of things could you incorporate into your morning routine to enable you to start your day better?  For me, I hate getting up and rushing straight out - so even if I have to be somewhere really early - I will always set my alarm a few moments earlier - so I can have 10 mins in bed before having to get up…....and that starts my day better.  Another thing I always do is some deep breathing and a few yoga sun salutations to start my day….....what would work for you?  Maybe some yoga, maybe some dancing, maybe breathing deeply, maybe sitting in a garden and watching birds - or taking time to take a walk through nature on your way to Uni - make time to incorporate those things into your life.
You say you find it hard to do your uni work - and I wonder is it starting doing the work or completing the work?  Again as in the morning routine, what little things could you put in place to make you feel more motivated to do your work?  Look at how you have worked until now and look at what works for you and what doesn’t?  Maybe you push yourself too hard and when you start your work, make yourself do too long without a break - maybe incorporating pleasurable breaks into your work would be better…..........or look at the times of the day that work best for you? Maybe you are someone who doesn’t really come awake until later in the day and you are best working in the evening or maybe you are someone at their best at 6am…......Discover what works best for you.

As well as doing these different things - I know at Uni - it is usual to have a rather limited diet - but as far as possible try to restrict your caffeine / alcohol intake and drink lots of fresh water (which energises the body) and eat as much fresh fruit especially bananas that you can.  I know Helen will probably be able to recommend some great herbal remedies that can help alleviate the symptoms of depression.

Have you tried speaking to your tutors and explaining what is happening for you and asking how they could support you as you heal…...they may be able to offer you extra support?

Good luck and well done on what you have achieved so far.

Love Allison

Allison Kelsey
Therapist, coach and trainer
‘Release the past, create the future you want’
http://www.inspireyoga.co.uk

Question

obsessional thoughts

I have suffered from depression fairly frequently .When i am at my worst i become obssessive about the opposite sex .I develop crushes on people which become all consuming ,like a hunger which can only be satisfied when i see this person .I will do anything to see this person and can think of nothing else ! I have 3 kids and a husband so it is obviously detrimental ! Sometimes i feel like killing myself ! I have been good for ages but can feel myself going on a downward spiral again !! A dvise would be helpful !

Answer

Dear Jane

So sorry you are suffering this - but it is a good sign that you are aware enough to notice it is about to start again…...

First of all, when you say that sometimes you feel like killing yourself - if this is a real thought that you feel in danger of contemplating, then please seek urgent help - from your doctor, from the Samaritans http://www.samaritans.org/ or from a local therapist / friend who you can trust and can talk to face to face.

As you say you can feel yourself going on a downward spiral - are you aware of anything that happens that triggers these thought patterns?  Have you noticed how frequently they occur?  Now it may be that when you look back you can see that the downward spiral of events start at a certain time of the year, the month - or before or after certain events, emotions etc.  For example, if there are challenging circumstances, it could be that the obsesive thoughts become a diversion (which in some way - some part of your mind prefers this diversion to the “other” that you may be unconsciously or consciously wanting to avoid).

However it may be that there is no obvious pattern…...

You mention that you have suffered depression fairly frequently - and I wonder if you are under your GP and if you are on any medication?  If not, then I would suggest a trip to your doctor to describe your symptoms and obsessions to you and he may be able to offer some kind of help - possibly medication or possibly a referral to a counsellor….. 

Obviously only you know how strong these feelings are - but I am wondering as soon as you start to notice them - is something else you can start to do - where you will use that incredible energy - for example, running, walking, dancing (try a salsa or zumba class) or yoga - or some other form of yoga that you fancy that you could channel that energy towards….....in this way, you could “trick” your brain into thinking that this feeling means it’s time to exercise.  However, I do know very little about you - so you may already be someone who exercises frequently and by doing this - instead of helping you divert your energy, this could change an obsession with a member of the opposite sex to an obsession with exercising. 

I hope this helps and I do urge you to get in touch with a local professional then please do come back to us, either via another question or posting on the forum to share your experiences with others who may be going through similar and be able to offer ideas on what has and hasn’t worked for them

Take care
Allison

Allison Kelsey
Therapist, coach and trainer
‘Release the past, create the future you want’
http://www.inspireyoga.co.uk

Question

Why is it back again?

I have had depression for many years for which I have taken a variety of anti depressants, I finally gave up on the pills three years ago and went privately to a counsellor, this was my third lot of couselling but this one was long term it lasted for nearly two years and oncovered at lot of problems which I had had in my teens, but in all honesty I did not realise the effect they had had on me, anyway after the counselling I felt so much better until the last few weeks,but now it seems to be returning, I have been wondering if there could be a hormonal problem? I am now 55 but as I said I have been depressed for years but the first serious bout I had was just after giving birth to my son. Can you give me any advice?

Answer

Hi there

Thanks for your question and I am sorry that you feel that the symptoms of depression are returning again.

Without knowing your full medical history and the events in your life I can’t be too specific on what is causing a resurgence of these symptoms, but it could well be hormonal amongst other things.

As women our hormones certainly play a bit part in our mental health and our emotions. As we know, we go through a cycle of hormones every 28 days approx and most women notice a difference in their body shape, their moods, their emotions and their behaviour during this time - and over time if we are aware we notice how this cycle affects us.  As well as the 28 day cycle there are certain phases or passages in our life when the dramatic changes in our hormones can cause changes in our moods, our behaviour and our mental health.  These times are puberty, pregnancy, post natal, perimenopause, menopause and so it is possible you are going through the perimenopause or menopause causing mood fluctuations.

However, there are certain passages in our lives which are not necessarily hormonal but which can also have a destabilising effect on our emotions - time such as - children going off to university, children getting married, becoming a grandparent, divorce, a new relationship, death of a friend / relative / colleague, redundancy etc.

It could be that one or several of these are occuring in your life.

I would suggest visiting your GP and having a chat to him to see if this is perhaps some symptoms of depression returning or if it is a low mood or a change in your emotions due to outside circumstances.

Sometimes the culture that we live in, leads us to expect that we have to feel good / happy / fulfilled / positive / energetic and so on all the time.  This is not realistic and is not healthy for us either to believe this.  It has been said that depression is actaully a suppression of emotion.  So if we expect that we “should” be happy all the time, then if we feel low / bad / sad - we make ourselves wrong for feeling that way and seek to hide the feeling or anaesthatise it in some way - maybe food, maybe shopping, getting busy or drugs. 

If on the other hand we see all emotions as being good for us and take the low ones with the high ones, and look at them as your “friend”, as your barometer and think - if there is a message for me in this emotion, such that if I took notice of it, acted on it and made the necessary changes in my life then this emotion had done it’s job and could go away.  Sometimes these changes are tiny - like noticing when you eat regularly and proper meals then you feel good, but when you skip meals or eat junk food you feel bad, or when you have less than 8 hours sleep you feel unable to cope but when you have more - everything seems more achievable - or they can be major changes, when you realise that the person you are sharing your life with is no longer good for you, or you sense you need to move to a different part of the country.

It may be a good idea to keep a mood diary for a short while - maybe give yourself a mood rating - on a 1 to 10 basis with 10 being fantastic, 1 being awful.  Perhaps you may want to have several of these for each day - perhaps morning, afternoon and evening.  Also write down who you meet, who you spend time with, what you do, whether you are outside, inside, with people or alone, moving or sedentary, sameness of variety, what you ate, how long you slept - and then after a week or two look for any patterns.  Once you see the patterns do what you can to change things - it may mean getting out more, moving more, watching less TV, eliminatintg certain people from your life…..

Also you mentioned that you had counselling over an extended period of time and it helped.  Imagine for a moment that your mind may be like an onion with lots of layers.  It could be that as you worked through your past, you exposed and worked through several layers or this onion….......and perhaps now it is time to shed another layer to become more of your wonderful authentic self.  Our mind is incredibly clever and will never present to us anything that we are not ready to and have the resources to deal with….....so perhaps you are now strong enough to shed another layer and your good ol’ unconscious mind has presented you with another lot of “untruths” limited beliefs or negtivities to let go of….....  so see this as a positive.  Letting go of the old and moving forward to embrave the new.

How would you feel about maybe contacting your counsellor again or if you wanted to try something different, an NLP Therapist or Coach who will work with you to let go of the past and move forward into the present and the future.

I am a big fan of physical movement and at present am developing a programme for working with groups to work towards healing some depression using yoga. If you haven’t done yoga before then I would suggest joining a local class and practising regularly - at first some people find it emotional as old patterns are released through their bodies - but this can only be a positive thing.

Good luck - I hope some of this helps and has given you some hope and positivity moving forwards.

With love
Allison

Allison Kelsey
Therapist, coach and trainer
‘Release the past, create the future you want’
http://www.inspireyoga.co.uk