Good evening all.

Returning to the fold after a lengthy absence and would be grateful of some help and assistance.

Have suffered mild experiences of depression, never medically confirmed apart from slight intimation from Dr. I always seems to see it through but I am a sufferer to over worrying about situations which have an effect on me and cause me slight anxieties. Which sometimes when I compare my concerns to others it appears highly insignificant.

Where I require guidance and assistance is I’m looking at some coping strategies for dealing with anxiety with work issues including a manager who is unsupportive with work situations and not aware of personal concerns.

It’s probably doesn’t help that my social life and personal relationships are lacking somewhat! So maybe that’s all I have to concentrate on, which isn’t ideal.

It’s not my intention to go down sickness route re work but I’m considering it further down the line if no major improvement. I was considering going to see my Dr and explaining my anxieties and beginning to.log situations.

I would appreciate feedback on how others cope with their work concerns as get fed up of period of disturbed sleep and causing to me of irritation? Maybe once get life back up and running it will be less of an issue.

Thank you for your time and help

x

Hello Lovelylol.  I am sorry to hear that you’re not feeling great.  On a positive note you seem very aware of your symptoms and some of the possible causes and are prepared to try anything before exercising the option of taking time off work.  I find having something ‘in my back pocket’ helps me to cope too as I know that if things don’t get any better and I feel that I can’t cope there is something I can do so I don’t feel so helpless and out of control which are emotions that make depression worse.  I remember going to a conference where a psychiatrist was talking about her own experience with depression.  She told the audience that she had often thought about killing herself.  When things were at their worst for her she decided she would give things one more chance and to give things 6 months to get better before giving herself the ultimate way out of killing herself.  It was in that 6 months that her life turned around, she met some amazing people and started her own journey to become a therapist and now is very happy so she is definitely an advocate of ‘if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again’.  I don’t want to dwell on her way out as that is the worst and most negative and devastating way out but your’s is a very reasonable means to an end.
I swear by the Bach Flower ‘Rescue Remedy’ for worry and anxiety.  I used to feel that I had to depend on valium but feel ‘Rescue Remedy’ works just as well for me without the side effects of medication.  I always carry a small bottle with me.
I also find that breathing in to the count of 4, hold for 3 and out to the count of 5 helps me calm down and get myself together.
When I find myself worrying excessively about things I consciously stop myself and ask myself how I will feel about the situation that is worrying me in 6 or 12 months time which often helps me to put things into perspective.  Like you I am prone to worrying too.
Often I find that if I act like things don’t bother me, they don’t bother me as much and other people pick up on my attitude and act differently to me.  So it seems I can trick my own mind and others! I have found that if I act for long enough my mind and body believe it and start acting that way naturally. 
I know that we are all very different and different things work for different people but anything is worth a try and I hope this helps somewhat.
One thing I am a big advocate of is trying to do something every day that you enjoy.  Mine is to have a cappuccino.  It’s simple, not too expensive and it makes me feel good as I look forward to it, enjoy it and afterwards feel like I’ve had my treat for the day.
Thinking of you and hope that you have a good week.
Best wishes, Helen

Dear Lovelylol, worry and anxiety are horrible.  I’ve had them both.  I tend to be a perfectionist and a people pleaser.  When my anxiety and worry got so bad I had to relax on the perfectionist front and felt I didn’t have the energy to please everyone. Bizarrely I noticed I started to feel better and now I try to make an effort not to try to be perfect and worry about pleasing everyone at work and at home.  I’m not saying these are your issues too but thought it could be so thought I’d share.  Take care you.  Will.