What to do when your world falls apart
.By Maggie Richards, Sep 21, 2010 AOL TODAY
Filed under: Wellness

When suffering a setback, you get a rush of thoughts and emotions and try everything to stop them, but they keep flooding in. Try this simple five-step process for a potentially rapid recovery from emotional shock.

First feel
Give yourself time to really feel what you’re feeling. We’re socialised to block out our emotions, to pretend that we’re not hurt, scared, angry etc. and so we habitually don’t’ give ourselves the space to be real with what’s happening to us.

This makes things worse, because the only way to free yourself of an emotion is to feel it fully. Pushing it down just makes it grow. So take time out and really allow yourself to feel. It may be scary but keep at it. It’s the kindest thing you can do for yourself.

Then, adjust your mindset
“Remember that all setbacks are there to help you learn and grow” says Dr. Lisa Turner of Psycademy, a specialist in personal transformation. “So as your emotions ease off, start asking yourself some empowering questions.”

She suggests:
How can I change this?
What do I need to learn from this?
How can I use this situation to grow bigger than this problem?

“Everything that happens has its root cause somewhere in the past” says Dr Lisa. “Ask the right questions and you can move away from being ‘problem focused’ to feeling OK, no matter what’s going on.”

Trust in the power of trust
Try developing a sense of trust that all is well. It takes practice and perseverance. Be warned: your ego mind is going to put up a fight! It wants to see problems everywhere and keep you ‘small.’

What makes conscious people the happy folk they are is that they believe - and know through direct experience - that despite appearances, everything is unfolding just as it needs to. You will recover.

Look for the hidden opportunity
The late Napoleon Hill, an American expert in positive mental attitude, said that opportunity usually comes disguised as a setback. So dig a bit deeper and find the hidden opportunity. Meditation can help.

“If you do this, you’ll be one of a rare set of people who do – and those rare few end up being the successful ones” says Dr Lisa.

Get expert support
Consider doing some personal development work to improve your emotional resilience. Just like exercising to get a better body, you can boost your emotional and mental strength with therapy and/or coaching, which is specifically designed to move you forward.

I hope this helps Xx

Trust in the power of trust - LIFE IS ABOUT TO GET LOVELIER Xx
Try developing a sense of trust that all is well. It takes practice and perseverance. Be warned: your ego mind is going to put up a fight! It wants to see problems everywhere and keep you ‘small.’

I practice this and it really works

The late Napoleon Hill, an American expert in positive mental attitude, said that opportunity usually comes disguised as a setback. So dig a bit deeper and find the hidden opportunity.

Thank you for such an advice. I pray that this would really help. I’m going through very hard trying times, and it’s turning me a depressive nut every day. I have been locked up in a state where I feel hopeless and helpless. I feel alone and terrible.

helped .
thank you for your advice

Hello Xxx sorry to hear you feeling that way ....I have been feeling a little low myself lately…I began to tell myself life is about to get lovelier Xx I text a friend this morning life is lovelier Xx because its my thoughts that make things bad…my life is lovely I have a gorgeous daughter a beautiful network of friends here in my home town in my life. I have a roof over my head and can afford to eat. I know I am loved and I know I have been loved Xx Have you looked at the Byron Katie webpage I put on this morning. Have you read marissa peers books ...I learnt from her I am enough and began to accept myself for who and what I am accepting myself helped me to love myself and others grow to care about me. My life has changed alot over the last year I have met the most amazing people and I have been blessed with one or more great friends. One blunt male friend turned my life around and the most amazing girl friends have helped me. Brencoot on here helped me realise LIFE IS OUT THERE and the blunt male friend told me we choose to be alone. Its my choice and today I choose to be happy Xx big hug and hope your day is blessed with wonderfulness I hope you catch a butterfly and you dance with laughter ...I hope a happy tune strikes a cord with a beautiful memory that brings you joy and love and know life is about to get lovelier. Take the right path the new you the happy content loving you and on the left path you can leave the old sad you to the past. Drag up all the happy times that make you giggle. Smell that beautiful clean fresh air and tell yourself you are STRONG you are AMAZING and from this moment on you can make the changes in your life to improve your sense of well being Xxx hugXxx Chloe

http://www.thework.com/index.php

The Work of Byron Katie is a way of identifying and questioning the thoughts that cause all the fear and suffering in the world. Experience the happiness of undoing those thoughts through The Work, and allow your mind to return to its true, awakened, peaceful, creative nature

This really works for me Xx

Please buy marissa’s book ultimate confidence and read a little as much as you can each day Xx I made her book my bible it blessed me with the happy thoughts that I needed to survive. I now forget about the foundations that gave me such strength and her book and others like it help ...they keep me motivated keep me moving on that right path. Marrissas book didn’t tell me to get a grip she gave me the techniques the tools to get a grip. So many books tell me what I should be doing yet not how !!! marissa gave me the tools a survival kit. The first step on the ladder of onwards and upwards. I could say marissa peer was the route to my recovery SHE WAS THE START of it ...XX I am enough Xxx always enough Xx hug Xx lots of love Chloe

It’s like everyone “here” is given everything they want, in any way, shape, or form they want it. And for most, it’s all they could ever imagine.

But for a few, there’s time and space. Where even shinier, faster, richer, and happier, are still options.

You overachiever,
  The Universe

xxX My tutor told me off at uni when I was studying abnormal psychology he said you live in a fluffy bunny world and life is shit ...I said my life is great sorry to hear about yours…he said councellors are blood suckers wanted to thrieve on other peoples misery why would I choose such a vocation he pitied me. I pitied him!! My blunt friend would say you have a choice ? you can choose happy or sad…you can choose to see the good you can choose to see the bad ...the bad makes me feel sad..hey yet my polly anna world is great Xxx glad you joined us Xx hug Xx hey do you think your enough yet XX great come in the waters lovely XX Chloe

I am glad I helped inflateable jump Xx your name is a great Xx ha ha sounds bouncey I saw you on carers and thought you were an advert sorry I ignored you…Xx