struggling since yesterdahy to believe that life is woth going on with. i know i am fortunate to have the life i have, but it is meaningless when the world itself seems so chaotic, manippulative and false. nothing is real, nothing is true, nothing is believable. can’t stop worrying about work even though i’m not there. can’t stop remembering what it’s like when things get going at work. knowing i have to return to that soon, and the cycle starts again, hangs over me and terrified me. there is no escape, except one.

Hi Glynis, are you back to work on Monday?  If you are, do you think that is linked to how you are feeling?  I remember the terrible drastic shifts in my mood; from low to rock bottom; from OK to cliff edge panic.  I found a mood diary helpful Glynis.  It also makes me realise how lucky I am to have come through the darkest days that I never thought possible. 
I too used to feel that there was one way out and I hate to sound morbid but it’s not that easy!  I tried twice and failed.  In the end when I woke up after 2 days and sectioned in an NHS hospital there was a sudden change in me that I can’t explain. It was like a light switch flicking on.  Thank goodness my psychiatrist had just written a controversial paper about it in Scotland and believed me so only kept me in for a month.  He wrote that after the sudden realisation of the seriousness of one’s situation one has an epiphany like experience and subconsciously decides they have to do something about it.  Please try to nurture yourself this weekend and be kind to yourself.

Helen

Oh Glynis poor you,

I’m so sorry your feeling bad again after doing so well over the last week or two :-(

You could try reading through your recent posts to remind yourself you that you were feeling a bit better and that you soon will again.

Recovering from depression has been described as climbing up the scales of a dragons back. You go up a scale and then come down the other side but slowly but surely the downs arn’t as far down as the earlier downs - they just feel that way because the ups are higher then the earlier ups. In other words, although there are ups and downs, the overall underlying trend is up. Unfortunately is takes a while, but we get there eventually.

I’m reading a book by Sonja Lyubomirsky (A Doctor of Social Psychology) - called “The How of Happiness” In this book there are 12 strategies that are scientifically proven to increase people’s happiness levels. The unique feature of this book is there is a questionnaire to complete that indicates which of the strategies are likely to have the most positive effect for each individual. It then gives a detailed description of how and when to apply each strategy for maximum effect as indicated by the results of her and other psychologists research. The idea behind the book is we all have a base line level of happiness which can be raised by 40% by following the most appropriate for you.

The bbok says that “cures” for depression only return you to your baseline level, but implementing these strategies could raise your long term happiness levels to new heights. The empirical data provided to substantiate these claims is quite impressive.

I know you haven’t had much luck with CBT (one of the strategies) but one or more of the others might be better suited to you as an individual?

I hope you’re feeling better soon.

Karma

glad to be here and its cool to read all the threads in this forum.

Hi Karma, another one of your books that I want to add to my reading pile, thank you Karma.  I must put it on the site too as you recommend it.  How are you doing Karma?  I hope you had a lovely weekend.  Helen

Alisson, welcome to the site.  I am pleased that you’ve enjoyed reading the posts.  They help me and hope they help and are of interest to you and others too. There are some very wise words from some amazing people here.  I’m glad that you’re sharing them.  Best wishes, Helen