Hi Will,

Nice to hear from you. Your thoughts are understandable but no thats not why my husband is annoyed. He is part of the older society (20 years my senoir) that doesn’t understand depression and thinks its all superifcial.

My husband has gone to bed. Are you all UK mainland??

Elaine you are amazing bringing the perpetrator to face his actions, I think you are absolutely AMAZING XXXXX I never had the courage or the strength to do what you are doing. Whenever I get myself into your situation I tell myself it is only a process a means to an end and when it is all over I’ll give a big sigh of relief. You can talk to us Xxx we’ll listen that’s why we are all here Xxx Elaine you are a wonderful wonderful person XXXXHUG YOUXXXLOVE YOUXXXX joan of arc, Elizabeth I , Margaret thatcher, Kate Moss, Jordan, Fern Britton Lady Di, Fergie strong independent women throughout history YES you can beat this. XXXX

Kayfer I am so glad to hear you are your former self again Xxx my inspiration, I have dropped 4lb back on the marissa diet. My friend said Oestrogen wasn’t good for women, so I have switched to rice milk which tastes better I had my friends back last night with all their children and they were enjoying the rice milk and soya milk. My daughter is drinking soya milk. I hypnotised a friend yesterday who keeps eating the cakes and biscuits at conferences because she is hungry, so I introduced Marissa’s pack lunch idea, which she thought was super. Plus the I am enough. Actually I used to worry that I would be the odd one out and be conspicuous yet it has proved that people like to follow the ideas with me Xx I have been listening to esther and jerry hicks at the moment,the vortex which I am enjoying. I shall let you know about it and listening and reading you passion shall find you. Some of my friends are finding their passion by chance too lately. One is knitting T coseys to sell another is painting plates. Have you made any cards yet ? Love you lots Kayfer XXX so good to hear from you Xx

Kayfer I found with my husband I have to spell it out to him too Xx it’s not that he doesn’t care he just doesn’t think Xx HUG

Hello Brencoot Xx we are hoping to build a feild shelter for the animals this weekend, they have one yet we want to make another one. My friend and I managed to catch a sheep pin him down wash and clean him and we felt like real farmers wives and had a great laugh together. Yes I found that when I was younger the teasing boys liked me and I hated them ha ha. I guess thats how they showed a mate they liked them so do it to the girl they like. Anyway the charmers broke my heart, so I wished I had liked the one who teased me and I would not have had such a hard time. My husband teases me now and I bite his head off, this conversation has just reminded me of the fact and I feel the ahhh going on about my husband and his dreadful teasing because sometimes I want to hit him ha ha. Brencoot thank you for coming on you are amazing and I do miss you Xx

Hi
wow what a day, first of all our neighbour really wanted us to see his house for some reason so we had a grand tour of that, it was quite interesting, bless him. His house was immaculate though, nothing out of place, it was like being in a show house, abit unlived in to us, then we came back here and tackled our cluttered mess, now the kitchen and dining room are unreconisable, with candles lit and the lights dimmed - it looks lovely now. I think he inspired us to get our house sorted.

we still have abit to do tomorrow but im unstoppable now and would do some now but dont want to wake little one, im making the spare room into a room for my yoga and relaxing in (my sanctuary) well thats the plan if I manage to keep it tidy, I dont know why but I can be so messy and then I wonder why i get stressed when I cant find anything.

well thats my news for now, im going to bed soon ready for another action packed day tomorrow, Im hoping to find the time to go to a craft fair, my hubby seems keen for me to go, well he mentioned it to me, perhaps I will after finishing my sanctuary, I would really love to get into the habit of doing some Yoga every morning before my day begins as I really believe it will energise and destress me for the day ahead.

night night, hope your all having a good weekend so far.

Chloe - well done on the 4lb you lost on the marisa diet, sounds like you have loads of will power, I bet you look fab.

I havent made anymore cards - yet. I do want to its just finding that time, any ‘me’ time I do get I seem to spend on here these days - but I have a feeling I will have lots more time before long (as the house is taking shape now)

I really feel ive turned a corner these last few days and had a good lifecoaching session yesterday, Im really getting into it now and am more relaxed with her than i was, I do think I shall start having the sessions fortnightly though as once a week is proving abit much - money wise, especially with little ones birthday and christmas coming up. Luckily though I am getting more counselling sessions which are funded so Im really pleased about that.

thanks again Chloe, you really have helped me these last few weeks.  ooh just remembered I need to take my last St Johns wort of the day, I really think they are helping as well, that and trying to be more positive and the support im getting, also just knowing im ready to go back to work has given me a lift.

I still need to buy the Omega 3 tablets Helen recommended and I want to buy the book A Compassionate Mind, Paul Gilbert - have you read that one Chloe?

oh yeah Brencoot, forgot to say but Ive now started a great Dancercise class, the woman who does it is brill, and is a dancer herself so am taught by someone who really knows her stuff, I shall be on Strictly Comes Dancing next year ummm I have a long way to go before that lol

Dear Elaine,
The upcoming date must be stirring up a lot of emotions for you.  Is your doctor aware of your situation and your impending date?  I feel sure that that will speed up your counselling.  Does your partner know about what happened to you?  Do you think that he is afraid that by coming on the site and talking that you’ll stir up the past that he would rather forget?  Sorry for all the questions Elaine. 
I do know what you mean about the awareness and understanding of depression and attitude to depression that our generation has being quite different to past generations.  Maybe that comes from the fact that there was not the awareness of what depression was or the help available for depression in the past that we have today and they saw and heard people soldiering on and felt obliged to ‘put up and shut up’ and do the same.  There must have been a lot of silent unhappiness.  Maybe there was less unhappiness but I can’t believe that everyone was happy in those days.  I know that we all hanker after the ‘good old days’ but times were tough and I think that we see them through rose tinted glasses.  People didn’t used to talk about things in those days did they?  Now we are told to get things off our chest and out into the open to stop them coming back to haunt us in the future or making us ill.  I look forward to you getting the chance to do that very soon Elaine and hope that your counselling comes in time to prepare you properly for the case and see you through it and beyond.  If not, we are all always here to help in any way we can. 
Sorry there was no one on the site when your husband went to bed the other night.  I realise that would probably have been a good time for you to talk.  I do hope that you are ok and maybe having a weekend off ‘in lieu’ of the Birthday weekend you worked!  Best wishes, Helen

Kayfer XXx gosh I love the sound of the yoga room WOW WOW WOW Xxx you amaze me you have come so far. Yes still sticking to marissa’s eating plan I HAVE SO MUCH ENERGY Xx heeeee heeeeee plus a strang thing has happened my hearing has improved. I heard from a friend cows milk can encourage glue ear. Well this morning it was as if somebody had turned the volume up on everything even the cups chinked louder as I put them in the dish washer soooooooooo amazing I never realised I was so deaf !!!! Glad to hear you are taking the saint johns wort and it is working how excellent. I read a herb book once and it said pharmacists have to learn about herbs because they are medicine. I have been drinking soya oat and rice milk and I must say the rice milk is the nicest in tea. It was marissa who said we starve ourselves fat as we starve our bodies of essential fatty acids nutrients vitamins and minerals when we eat junk. Yes I shall look at the book you mentioned , I haven’t read it yet thank you for that XXXHUGS XXX I need to go and see to my daughter Xxx your wonderful Kayfer Xxx you really are Xx Have a wonderful weekend XxxxXxxXXxxXxx you wonderful wonderful you Xxxxxx

Dear Beautiful Elaine XXX yes I am in the uk East Hampshire Xx hope you are feeling well today Xxx HUG YOU XXX LOVE YOU XXXX you are a strong amazing woman and you can beat this Xxx Stay being strong Xxx