Kayfer did you read about Kate Moss and her comment about being thin was more pleasureable than eating, I got what she meant she was imploying the pleasure pain theory which is in Marrissa book very simple and I got Kate’s drift why do the press have to twist it. Poor girl she has to stay slim to be a model and her logic stops her OVER eating can’t they see that !! she doesn’t starve herself because you can see she is not aneroxic. She just says that to herself to stop overeating, she still eats. Better than my waste not waist not haa haa. Gosh the pleasure pain theory is a very powerful tool, i get it Kate Xx. XXXwhat do you think ? XxHUG Xx

Hello Angel, I do hope that you are well.  I also hope that you enjoyed your week off and that you didn’t end up dwelling on your situation at work.  I also hope that your weekends don’t get cut short with the well known Sunday night before the Monday morning feeling.  Life’s too short and work doesn’t deserve that time.  It gets enough of your time.
It sounds like you have a busy homelife with a wee one to run around after!  I am sure that keeps your feet firmly on the ground at home and also brings a wonderful light into your life.  I often think that if a child can’t make us smile, nothing can.  Their innocence makes me laugh and melt. My nephew asked my sister to invite me to lunch yesterday.  When I said I couldn’t go I heard him ask my sister for the phone and all he shouted was ‘I love you!’  I came off the phone giggling which made my day in front of my computer seemed much easier after that. 
As for work, it’s a shame that they are not making the most of your wonderful personality but maybe that person/people is/are jealous of your wonderful personality and feels inferior and their own insecurity is manifesting itself in bullying. Bullying seems to be a coping mechanism that people use when they don’t know how else to direct their own anger and insecurities.  It’s not up to you to have to deal with their issues.  My sister always says to put insults in the bin and the bullies outside where they belong.  Easier said than done I know.  Work is only part of your life.  It would be great if it were as wonderful as your home life.  Unfortunately other peope bring their unhappiness from home to work and try to pass it on.  Imagine a little shield of light and energy around you. Others can share it if they want but allow it to buffer you from others who are trying to spread negativity.  You sound like a lovely person Angel.  If the people at work aren’t receptive to that lovely person, it’s their loss. If they want to stay miserable, that’s up to them.  Keep trying to break through if it doesn’t drain you or just get on with the job in hand.  Whatever works for you Angel.  I love Chloe’s words.  She’s a wise woman isn’t she?  The turnaround principle and the analysis of the Captain and his men or the carpenter and his tools are very interesting and very true.  She is right though.  A manager should ‘manage’.  Managers are often very busy and stressed themselves or don’t have the management tools or confidence to be as effective or as helpful as we would like.  We are always here Angel.  Thinking of you.  Helen

Yes Xx I agree with Helen about the bullies Xxx My first job I had a hell of a time at the hands of this young lad. He was so cruel to me and would call me really horrid names. He was loud and cruel and a true bully. Later I found out he was treated badly by his wife, she would publicly ridicule him and be cruel. I was horrified !! It explained why he was nasty to me. All the upset was sorted when this wonderful lady became head of admin and she was really kind to him and clever. She was extremely beautiful witty and had amazing emotional intelligence, he stopped all his cruelness to please her and she became a dear friend… Other men over periods of my life from time to time would be really nasty about my weight i.e whilst I was eating my lunch one said save your food a journey and stick it straight on your fat A**e . I later found they had really large wives. Yes as I have got older I am amazed by why people judge others Xx love helens sisters psychology XXHUG XX I was listening to Dale Carnegie and he said a man had a problem with his mother for 30 years her behaviour frustrated and agrevated him. He then noticed other people laugh and mocked his mothers behaviour and yet they would not fall out with her. He then learnt to mock and laugh about her behaviour behind her back and realised he too could get along with her. I have found that the people that can take the mickey out of the bullies can make a laugh out of it, I have noticed that now at the school, it like a detachment. A very sweet beautiful friend once said to me detach the emotion, I guess this is a technique to do that. My husband picks on other peoples faults when they upset me. They might mention me being a chatter box and he’ll say something awful about them that ll make me smile. It does work wonders. Paul Mac kenna says to imagine them really small and tiny and insignificant, another author says to give them a squeakie duck like voice, might have been Mac Kenna or Marissa. One of my bosses once said to imagine somebody on the toilet when somebody was being mean. I remember my mum telling me to ask my dad a favour when he had fallen for my stepmother, I said why ? she said he is very much in love and very happy and happy people do really nice things. I guess it goes to say UNHAPPY people do nasty things. and Yes my dad did give me the money for the tax disc for my first car Xx I hope you smile through your troubles. Pack all your troubles in your old kit bag and smile smile smile there’s no use in worrying da da da da da so pack all your troubles in your old kit bag and smile Xx Marissa Peer says to sing a happy tune Xx that works wonders too Good luck XX HUG XX Hope this old chatter box can help ha ha Xx